Something that is not mentioned in many travel articles, and advice sites, is the feeling of being completely overwhelmed by solo travel. Most of them write about the opportunities and the happiness that they experienced, but rarely about the negative.
Today has been a, hopefully the first of very few, bad day.
For the first time since Monday I actually had some breakfast however dreary it was, unknown meat slices on bread is not my usual morning meal but how can I pass up a free meal.
After this, I went back to my dorm room and devoted my time to having a look at my future travel plans and I fretted about not being able to take the route I wanted (either the train doesn’t go that way or I refuse to pay £30 for a nights sleep) I found out I had to reserve seats on particular trains and couldn’t find out how to do so. Having spoken to someone with experience about this, I realised it’s not the end of the world. All the advice I had received before I left was positive, people talked about meeting others, and having fantastic nights out, and I was 5 days into this never got the chance to go out with people, either due to to my social anxiety or because the destinations I stayed in, didn’t really give that opportunity. I kept looking at my funds for this trip and debating whether or not it was worth it if i wasn’t enjoying myself. As my dorm was empty during this time, I actually ended up laying in bed and crying about my current situation, as the loneliness got the better of me.
After the tears dried, I took some time out from confining myself in my room, and thought I would go to the Het Loo Royal Palace. Unfortunately on my way there it started raining, still didn’t prepare myself for this, and I don’t know about you, but I refuse to pay €21/£17 to walk round someone’s wet garden. So I came back to the hostel. On my way back, the heavens opened and so I ran. Or I would’ve if my severely blistered feet would let me; they didn’t, of course they didn’t. So I trudged back to my room, this time even more disheartened by the day. I changed out of my wet clothes and put on something a little drier, and sat down to contemplate my oncoming future. I succeeded, I think. One positive is that I treated myself to a couple of nights cruise next month between Stockholm and Helsinki, so it’s not all bad.